I hope that wasn’t shame

What betrayed you first?
Body, mind, or the muscular
structures in your face?
It certainly wasn’t your heart,
forfeit long before
So I imagine you didn’t
know what to think,
or to do,
or how to breathe, in
this chance situation that
has befallen you and yours
and me and mine.
With quite the hurry,
you pretended not to see
but your feelings did scurry,
scuttling your facade with
clinical efficiency.
I hope that wasn’t shame, you
haven’t earned that
the luxury of
feeling the way that I do.

Refuse

Cast me out
Refuse to be collected
Refuse to be responsible
for I am untenable, a weight
Refusing to yield, you
insatiable you. Taken
took, and unscarred you
Carry on, onward, towards
the abyss, soon to collect us all.
I refuse the void, but
I can’t be refuse to you.

In your sleep

You may be asleep, but
you are hardly unaware.
Hardly unaware of my movements
the tiny shifts in my position.
The tiny shifts you must bear,
as I wake for work.
Hardly unaware when your face creases,
a small smile creeps in, You
are at peace.
At peace, because even subconsciously
Entirely subconsciously, you know
It is only m.,
It is only me in these intimate,
moments, made for me.
In the same way that you were.
Made for me I mean, and
I’m rambling
Rambling because I’m not
Good at handling such weight
Such weight that comes from,
What we’ve built
This bed, this house, together
We’ve built such things, with
Such weight. At peace
you understand, that I am enamored
with how you smile at my presence
And my presence is rewarded,
your half-conscious smiles,
That I am enamored.